Higher Power and how to find him

Higher Power and the program of alcoholic anonymous. Where does it all start? We pray to the toilet Gods and forget him. Was this a higher power we prayed to when we were in jail and then forgot him again when we get out? No where in my life had I heard about this higher power so why should I believe in him? It wasn't until the early days of alcoholic anonymous did I hear about this higher power. They said I would have to come to believe in a power greater them my self. That sounded foolish to me because I could fix any thing so why would I need this higher power. I was, at that time, full of false pride and self pride with a big ego. I thought I had every thing under control.

Some hard-coreChristians will not get along with this higher power, but some of us do not believe to start with and had to start some where. We had to find a power greater then ourself. Hear me out. There is only ONE God and it doesn't matter what we have to call him to find him.

In the early days when iIwas in and out of jails for short stays, a man told me if I didn't have a higher power then what was the jailer? He had the key to the cell and the front door. And maybe it was time for me to set my sights on a higher power who could help me, a higher power I could have faith in.

Some of the old timers told me that I would hear the word God in the meetings of alcoholic anonymous and if the word God ran me out of the meeting, the alcohol will bring me back.....and it did. Another thing I found was the word God is read 6 times in "how it works" in the big book. At the beginning of the meeting I would close my ears. I knew I was sober and that was all I needed. Who was this higher power? What could this higher power do for me that I couldn't do for my self ? I had the group of AA men to guide me and they kept telling me I needed a higher power. I needed a higher power more then I needed them. Besides that....if I could not fix it, it didn't need fixed. And I could just stick my head in the sand and hide.

I could make alcoholic anonymous my higher power and let God go away.

Throughout this website I will not tell you how to find a higher power or work the steps. I will tell you how not to work it. It didn't matter what the question was, I knew something about it and that was the facts. There was no other story to it. There was only one side to the coin. I had to find out every thing the hard way, even though the program gave it to me on a gold platter. I had to make it hard. I could not except that these people knew best and was trying to help me.

When it came to a higher power, the program and steps, this all came out of the big book. The first 164 pages of it. You can listen to other people and learn from the big book about the higher power and make it easy, or you can be like me, and close your mind to it all.

My higher power showed up in my life early. I wasn't about to except it, even though there were very short signs of help and happiness with it. It was for everyone else, not me. I could do it on my own. What part of humble did I not understand back then? Me and my higher power would talk a lot, fighting back and forth on who was going to win. Finally, hands down this higher power had defeated me. This higher power had won. I was mad at first, but afterward there was a sense of peace that I didn't know. I think I had finally excepted this higher power. It was hard but I did it. Today the more I give to this higher power the more he gives me peace, and the better my life gets. I no longer have to do any thing on my own. I have my higher power and my friends in alcoholic anonymous.

Back to you Christians....today my higher power is God. I can't live an hour with out him on my side. I now have peace and serenity in my life that I love. You can find your higher power in a 6 month program or do it by yourself and on your own and it take 6 years like me. Finding this higher power sometimes is not a easy thing to do. Finding your higher power is a personal thing. No one can find your higher power for you.

peace be with you and yours